Today the snow continued. The bus ride to work was a real treat, thankfully I already have a bus pass for the month so I didn't count that toward my budget, I will have to when it runs out though :( I realised just how much buying food at the Co-op is today, I managed a red pepper, bag of spinach, a red onion and a £1 choc milkshake (inability to resist...herein lies my issue perhaps) on my four pound budget. I need to visit my local market or grocery shop I think, it will mean leaving work early to do that.
Real low point to my day which led me to instantly burst into tears was during a conversation with my mom in which I was explaining that my boyfriend is now in Singapore and is staying in a £250 a night hotel suite. I was explaining how I found this really hard to feel comfortable with, for me it seems completely passed luxury and into some other realm of excess. My mother's response was that it was his money to do with what he liked and let's face it he has more to show for his life than I do as I don't even have a car or a house. Very true and just words but it felt like I had been whipped, it really stung.
I am here because of my actions and inactions. This situation must change. I will not let myself be here again.
Was I being jealous? Unreasonable? Envious of my boyfriend? Would I do the same in his shoes? Truth is I have never lived excessively, I hope that I never will. Despite these debts, they were run up when I was exceptionally poor and they were effectively my income during that time. Is it wrong to actually enjoy the simple life? My boyfriend took me to a free windmill as a surprise once and I burst into tears I loved it so much (there appears to be a theme of tears). For valentines though he sent roses to work, then took me to a fancy french restaurant and then to a live comedy act (a BBC regular) all I did was tott up in my head how much it was all costing, I even zoned out during the comedian because I was thinking about it.
I do feel fortunate that I have a frugal family and frugal friends so hanging out with them is going to be easy, I also have a job which doesn't allow me the time to spend money on lunches or anything. My only concern is my boyfriend, should I be more open with him about it? I am slightly fearful that I may just snap the next time he suggests eating at Jamie Oliver's restaurant. Hmmm...
Hopefully tomorrow will feel more inspiring. Plllllease let tomorrow be more inspiring. For now I am going to sort out my sewing machine.
B
Monday 25 March 2013
Sunday 24 March 2013
Day one and two...the snow came!
I am happy to report sticking to my budget has been fairly straight forward so far (I am just the second day in) as the snow has arrived forcing life to grind to a welcome halt. My boyfriend is also away which means I have had every excuse to stay in.
Being in has given me to chance to check out the internet for stories of other people who have taken on a similar debt reducing challenge. Frugal in Cornwall has by far been the most inspiring. There lots of interesting stories out there though, which all made me feel alot more normal, there are a lot of people, it seems, that are ignorant about the debt they have.
I have spent most of today making giant daffodil pieces from wire and tissue paper as my class is having an easter bonnet competition, the wire I already had and the tissue paper was 63p for 3sheets. So less than a pound spent today.
Yesterday I baked my own bread...it was awful, I considered taking it into class a new frisbee but feared it would actually shatter a window, so instead I tried microwaving it and adding some cheese & olives. Still nearly broke my teeth on it but I was very full all evening. Today I have found a better recipe and method, bread appears to be all about the method. This one I shall try later, ready for tomorrow. Frugal Bread method I have all the ingredients in my cupboard so I am not taking this out of my budget just yet....hmmm maybe I should, not really getting the hang of this costing out meals thing yet.
My boyfriend is today away in Malaysia watching the Grand Prix, he is then off to Singapore and back here for Easter. He likes spending money and to be fair to him he has a lot of money to spend. We have only been together a few months and I am really not sure I can ever let on about this debt reduction. Perhaps I can tell him when I get out of it. For now, as far as he and my parents are concerned I am just trying really hard to save a deposit for a house...their is a hint of truth there..I HAVE to get rid of the debt so I can save for a house.
After reading the Frugal-in-Cornwall story I realised how many hours a week I could (if I got organised) spare to do some additional tutoring. I have signed up to a very well run tutor site, I have to give refs and have an identity check etc to tutor. Already I have set up appointments to meet three sets of parents for tutoring...that could mean an extra £60 a week in term time. Obviously you have to sort the tax but yikes that is a fair old amount for just three additional hours a week.
I did have a chuckle to myself yesterday though...really I should cry but what is the point..when the postman arrived with one letter from HSBC stating I have to pay my £1500 overdraft back by May 3rd, and another letter from Barclay card telling me my credit limit was to increase from £2480 to £4600 as of the end of the month. How the hell does that work? Thankfully I had already planned to pay off the HSBC first and for now the Barclay card can wait (note to self to cut up that card for fear of temptation) .
Being in has given me to chance to check out the internet for stories of other people who have taken on a similar debt reducing challenge. Frugal in Cornwall has by far been the most inspiring. There lots of interesting stories out there though, which all made me feel alot more normal, there are a lot of people, it seems, that are ignorant about the debt they have.
I have spent most of today making giant daffodil pieces from wire and tissue paper as my class is having an easter bonnet competition, the wire I already had and the tissue paper was 63p for 3sheets. So less than a pound spent today.
Yesterday I baked my own bread...it was awful, I considered taking it into class a new frisbee but feared it would actually shatter a window, so instead I tried microwaving it and adding some cheese & olives. Still nearly broke my teeth on it but I was very full all evening. Today I have found a better recipe and method, bread appears to be all about the method. This one I shall try later, ready for tomorrow. Frugal Bread method I have all the ingredients in my cupboard so I am not taking this out of my budget just yet....hmmm maybe I should, not really getting the hang of this costing out meals thing yet.
My boyfriend is today away in Malaysia watching the Grand Prix, he is then off to Singapore and back here for Easter. He likes spending money and to be fair to him he has a lot of money to spend. We have only been together a few months and I am really not sure I can ever let on about this debt reduction. Perhaps I can tell him when I get out of it. For now, as far as he and my parents are concerned I am just trying really hard to save a deposit for a house...their is a hint of truth there..I HAVE to get rid of the debt so I can save for a house.
After reading the Frugal-in-Cornwall story I realised how many hours a week I could (if I got organised) spare to do some additional tutoring. I have signed up to a very well run tutor site, I have to give refs and have an identity check etc to tutor. Already I have set up appointments to meet three sets of parents for tutoring...that could mean an extra £60 a week in term time. Obviously you have to sort the tax but yikes that is a fair old amount for just three additional hours a week.
I did have a chuckle to myself yesterday though...really I should cry but what is the point..when the postman arrived with one letter from HSBC stating I have to pay my £1500 overdraft back by May 3rd, and another letter from Barclay card telling me my credit limit was to increase from £2480 to £4600 as of the end of the month. How the hell does that work? Thankfully I had already planned to pay off the HSBC first and for now the Barclay card can wait (note to self to cut up that card for fear of temptation) .
Saturday 23 March 2013
Default wake up call
Since leaving university I have dragged around a huge amount (relative to my experience) of debt. I pay out, and have paid for 9years, around £400 a month purely in servicing my debt, personal loan, credit cards and overdrafts...I had two, they let me have three!
When I was 8 I decided I would one day go to uni, despite noone in my family ever doing exams before. Now I am the one wading in debt and they all own their homes and aren't seeming stressed to the gills by the job they do.
My debt isn't the tuition fees everyone talks about, I don't even think about that it as it disappears out of my pay check (now that I earn enough for it to go). My debt is the money that kept me alive when I was at university, rent, food, travel, photocopying, printing, books. You may have a maintenance loan (I did, the max amount you could get) but don't be fooled that doesn't cover your rent more often than not. If you want to eat and be able to wash your clothes you had to find some money somewhere else. So I went to the bank rather than to the pole dancing club.
I owe...*adds it up honestly* £8620. That is one, two, three credit cards and one, two, three overdrafts.
I graduated in 2004, I then went back to uni to train as a teacher in 2007. Since then I have just about been able to pay the minimum amount on all of that debt. I pay out around £400 a month and have done for nearly nine years and the debts don't get any smaller due to the interest on them, That is ...400x12x9= £43,200 ......holy shite that is first time I have worked that out. I have ALREADY paid £43,200 out and get I am still dragging it around! How is that possible! Why do they let you get into this mess? How did I let myself get into this debt. If I had saved that I could actually buy a house!
It ends here. I am getting out of this. I earn £31,000 a year, I should not be in debt like this. I will not allow myself to be here again. Ever again.
How will I save £8620? I will save it a bit at a time and pay it back a bit at a time. After deductions I take home £1700 a month. If I can get the cost of my living (include the current debt bill) to £700 a month then I can save £1000. Then by next new year I can be out of this. I could consolidate this amount as one loan and pay that off over five year...but I don't want another five years of it...and my credit rating is now so bad that I won't be approved. I tried.
Hmm....£700 a month... minus £400... £300 a month... I will have to move in with my parents, I will have to do without a car. I will give myself a budget of £4 a day. If I fail to cope I will still be in this mess next year and that would be a decade of debt. NO WAY!
Here goes.
Bella
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